Amanda-Leigh and Arthur Miller

One big blanket of snow painted the ground yesterday morning. This morning, nothing except dew will be left. As an older woman, I don’t find myself wanting to lay down in the snow and making angels anymore. I find myself inside my home enjoying the romance of the natural world outside. I am able to know better than to roll outside in the snow and ice. I do not have a purpose being outside in the bad weather the way of a child.

I have two new library books to read. This morning my focus is on the first. This library book is Arthur Miller: His Life and Work by Martin Gottfried. Arthur Miller’s cover has an older gentleman sitting on the steps of a stage. There are no lights or actors present. Only Miller sits in his spiffy dress shoes, a business suit, a white shirt, and a tie. His eyes are looking straight at the camera. With the passing of time, Miller’s hair has thinned out. He must wear thick glasses.

Looking at this picture, a readers hopes the stage experience to be productive. From personal experience reading Death of A Salesman in a literature course several years ago, I understood the man and woman. As a truck driver, Willy Loman spent years on the road traveling to provide finances for his wife and their two sons. This traveling salesman was not able to be the active husband or father his family needed. The American dream was impounded into Willy Loman’s veins. He wanted to have a nice house for his family. This unselfish act led me to write a poem at the time. I have lost the poem, but I remember gutting every feeling until I came to the core. This was the heart of the play.

I understood that a man needed to leave his family to gain independence and respect in order to provide well.  This did leave the wife and sons with feelings of abandonment. Their traveling salesman missed out on watching his two sons grow and mature. This play was written and produced before cell phones, text messages, and picture messages were thought about. Mr. Loman did not have a way to watch his son’s first baseball games or sit beside them at night to go over homework. The wife, Linda, missed having her husband at home. She raised two boys independently. If Mrs. Loman wanted to work, who would have watched her sons? At this time, Mrs. Loman did not have the power in her household to express her concerns, need to have a life independent of the home, or the strong voice women have today.

Why did Linda Loman stay in a marriage that did not show respect for the woman? What modern woman would want to be in such bondage and chains? Being married should not be this complicated for a woman. A woman should be able to freely express herself and her desires of entering the natural world independently. The woman does not leave the household the way Nora did in A Doll’s House.

The two female literary characters are opposite in character. Nora is a younger version of Linda Loman. Nora’s husband is not a traveling salesman. In fact, her husband is wealthy financially. I found Torvad to be verbally abusive the way he spoke to Nora. He was condescending and belittled her every chance he could. Nora’s character is not as tolerant of the man. As a young woman with small children, Nora makes the decision to leave at the end.

Each time I think of Nora leaving the home and stating her independence, I think of my first marriage. Eleven years have passed since I left on October 28, 2002. Not a day passes where I regret that wise move. Being married to a man who only wanted the flesh was not a good feeling to have. I deserved to be respected. I deserved to be loved for the woman I was. This led me to leave. My heart was broken in my marriage. As time passed, I began to think about Nora and what she put up with. That led me to realize I could do better. I did not need to be like Mrs. Loman who sat back and watched her husband leave a little more each time he traveled the roads.

When I reflect on Death of A Salesman, I try to imagine a scene where Willy Loman realizes he should not pull out of his driveway. Rather, he realizes his family comes first. Something stops Mr. Loman from leaving. He realizes the years he missed raising his two sons who are now grown. He realizes his wife’s hair has turned gray and she never lets it down anymore. He realizes life is too short to be traveling. He has no time for this dead-end life anymore. He gets out of the vehicle and goes inside his home to tell his wife everything he has discovered.

A man sits on the steps of a stage. No actors are present. No audience is there. A playwright sits on the steps. This playwright is looking at the camera. A half smile is present on his face. This is what readers walk away with. We walk away with the powerful words and images from a man who was able to experience the entire richness of the American dream. This man basked in its divine glory. There were no words left unsaid for the playwright. The reader is ready to open the cover and begin reading who this playwright really was. Was he written into any of his plays?  If so, which literary character best describes his real life? How will readers be able to distinguish this from fiction to fact? Does this playwright have room beside him for a ballerina with her dancing slippers? If a mood shoots me on target with an arrow, I can be a willing literary character who would love to be on the stage with such greatness and literary excitement. I hope this biography will feed my hungry taste buds and not leave me starving .