Tuesday, January 8, 2013

A Reflection of Modern Motherhood



Amanda-Leigh’s Definition of Modernism

What is modernism? Modernism’s definition was provided to me by my American Literature professor during the Spring semester of 2012. Last year I learned the meaning of modernism. I can look up the definition in my ever faithful companion of a dictionary I bought for a cheap price on Amazon to help me with words I did not know. This morning I am not in the mood to cheat on the knowledge I have learned during my recent experience with literature, religion, music, and biology in college. Modern is everything this being composed in today’s world. This includes advancements in technology, medical breakthroughs, music, media, food, drinks, and the self.

Reading modern literature is something I struggle with. I am not feeling the modern literature movement with my entire heart. The content in today’s writings are questionable. I believe really good writers could use better choice words instead of selecting the “f-bomb” and poor examples of positive role models for our impressionable young minds of modernism. Books written by Nicholas Sparks are on my reading list, but this piece does not make me want to change the world. These books are easy to read and finish in one night for me. When I finish a book, I move on to the next one. I am unmoved by the story plots. The story plots are about normal, everyday life. The literary characters and I share similar backgrounds and friends. I could picture myself in these comfortable, relaxed situations.

Something about modern literature brings a sense of discomfort to me. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?  On one hand, the stories I have read stories that bring discomfort to me. Reading Cynthia Ozick’s tragic story, “The Shawl” is still engraved heavily on my mind. What type of monster could ever throw a baby against an electric fence? In the book Saturday Matinee, Maxine Neely Davenports writes about what she knows best. The characters Davenport writes about deal with death, suicide, and domestic violence. In Cormac McArthur’s The Road, no names are given to any literary character. This becomes a universal story that I can place myself in and identify with. There are several stories that come to my mind that follow the same patterns.

On the other hand, I do not close the stories and walk away completely. In fact, I carry these stories and literary characters with me wherever I go. Sometimes I annoy my husband when he wants some intimate time with me and a thought about literature simultaneously pops into my mind and I feel the need to write something down. What is a wife supposed to do in a situation like this? These stories are a part of who I have become. I can’t set these characters down on the floor and pick up the pieces of their lives when it seems convenient. These modern writers provide a sense of justice for their literary characters.

Reflecting on Saturday Matinee by Maxine Neely Davenport

Twiggy is one of my favorite characters from Maxine Neely Davenport’s Saturday Matinee. Twiggy is not like most women from our modern time. Twiggy needs a place to stay, and she asks two of her female elderly family members if she can stay with them. The two sisters hesitate at first and then agree to let her stay. The story of this young lady’s becomes more interesting as time passes. As most readers would say, the plot thickens. Does this plot ever thicken! Twiggy has a small son who is adored by everyone. Twiggy is running away from an abusive relationship. After the sisters discover this truth, they become more empathetic and understand the situation better.

The morally right thing to do would have been to turn Twiggy in to the nosy local law officer who seems to show up at the sisters’ house more often than desired. The consequences to decision hide Twiggy are not really weighed in by the compassionate sisters. The consequence for harboring a fugitive from the law could have landed the sisters in prison. A SWAT team could have invaded the sisters property. Afterall, this is a work of fiction where this does happen!

I am able to relate to Twiggy because her life is real. I am sure a young single raising a small son alone is not too easy. Twiggy’s hard situation is not for me to judge. Instead of doing something self-destructive, this young lady reached out to women in her family. Instead of turning a cheek and denying assistance, the two sisters provided Twiggy with as much comfort of home as they could.

I would like to be optimistic and believe that Twiggy was able to attend a college or trade school. I would also to believe Twiggy saw the conservative style of dress these two sisters dressed and changed her pattern of clothing. Twiggy wore clothes that showed she had no self-respect. Too much of her body was revealed instead of the beautiful self.

I am related to the creator of Twiggy, and my paternal grandmother is mentioned at the end of this by the author. My paternal grandmother was the eldest child in a family of several girls and only one boy. The female author, Maxine Davenport, really impressed me one time. I am sure I met her several times at family reunions when I was a child. What I remember about meeting Maxine is the connection I felt. Perhaps it may have been the love of literature and writing. I remember receiving newsletters about what her side of the family was doing at Christmas time that she had composed. This woman really inspired me.

Much like my grandmother, Maxine graduated from college. Maxine graduated from the University of Oklahoma with both a degree in literature and law. For years, Maxine practiced law in Colorado. When Maxine retired, she began writing. Saturday Matinee is her first published first book. In the acknowledgement section, credit is to her adult children, who all begin with “M.” As an experienced writer, Maxine created a strong support network of friends and family and reached out to each for help editing her story. One opinion alone was not good enough to be a successful writer. This shows in Maxine’s use of imagination and character development.

Maxine may be my great-aunt but this is not the reason I enjoy reading her book and recommend it. When I read Saturday Matinee, there are several situations and literature characters that have made me re-read the story. Maybe I missed something the first time. A couple situations deal with being to cope with the death of a beloved in war and also the suicide of a beloved son and father. I am able to step into both perspectives and identify with the struggle of losing somebody special the same way. I will be revisiting Saturday Matinee in future writings.

Reflecting on Helena Maria Viramontes’ “Miss Clairol”

When I began Women’s American Literature during the Summer of 2012, the first story assigned during the second week was Helena Maria Viramontes’ short story “Miss Clairol.” During the first week, a writing over Kate Chopin’s “Desiree’s Baby” was assigned to be turned in on Friday. In American literature, a thorough discussion had been presented over “Desiree’s Baby.” That was no big deal. I knew the story well. I did not, however, know about “Miss Clairol.” When I first saw the title “Miss Clairol,” I thought this was going to be a pure, wholesome story about make-up.

First impressions of a story’s title can last longer than one that is true to its nature. “Miss Clairol” may have been an eye catcher but there is nothing glamorous about this story. In fact, there are some paragraphs I would have requested the author to re-write if I had been the editor. The word “trashy” does come to mind when I reflect on this story. This is not a positive story with positive examples of literary characters I would freely recommend to young, impressionable minds. I do, however, reflect back on this story when I hear of teenagers being victimized by predators in our society.

I may be a harsh critic of “Miss Clairol” but I have to admit the situation is real for our modern time. In this story, the central focus is on the relationship between a mother named Arlene and her soon-to-be teenage daughter, Champ. If you have read this story, there is a good question: What relationship do Arlene and Champ have? As a mother and woman, Arlene is not a positive example to an impressionable young girl. The heart of this story deals with not being to break comfortable patterns of the self.

In the beginning, Arlene and Champ are inside of a K-Mart store. This means that Arlene drove independently to the store instead of relying on a man. The way Arlene speaks to Champ is in a disrespectful and demanding manner. Arlene does not need to be using the “f-bomb” to speak to her own daughter or anybody else. Champ responds with one word replies. This situation is very uncomfortable to read, and I don’t blame Champ for tuning Arlene out and thinking her grandfather was the lucky one who escaped from this chaos.

A mirror is used in “Miss Clairol” as Arlene gets ready for a date she hopes will lead to a new physical relationship with a man. There are several description words used to describe how Arlene feels about herself. Make up, hair products, and clothe accessories are used to hide the woman Arlene. As a reader, I get the feeling the only time Arlene dresses up nice is to go out on a date with a new man. While Arlene spends hours dressing up, her daughter suffers. Champ is raising herself alone.

Arlene is not concerned with doing housework nor does she teach Champ to be an independent responsible young lady and learn how to clean house. The mother-daughter eat separate meals when Arlene goes out. The television shows Champ chooses to watch do not affect Arlene. When Arlene is physically in the home, she is far away thinking about how the date will go or imagining how to tell Champ about her first experience with a boy when she was a teenager.

Briefly, there is mention of an older son named Gregorio but he is not physically active in this story. There are clues that Gregorio has learned to take care of his white clothes by using bleach. When Gregorio appears to be late coming home, Arlene is not the one who notices. Champ notices. As a reader, I wonder if Gregorio has been negatively influenced by his mother’s wealthy dates with men. Did Gregorio abandon Champ by going on a date and forgot to tell Arlene? Or did he take after Alene’s poor example of parenting and get arrested for shop lifting?

Co-dependency is an important factor in “Miss Clairol.” Arlene is co-dependent on make-up, clothes, hair dye, and men for her personal happiness. Arlene is co-dependent on Champ for support for equality as a woman instead of being a strong parent figure. Arlene is co-dependent on Gregorio to watch Champ whenever she wants to go on a date.

Champ is not happy living in such a dysfunctional environment. She does not want to have a girl-friend relationship with her mother. Champ is embarrassed by the way Arlene behaves in K-Mart. Arlene does wear clothes that fit her body appropriately. Arlene stills from K-Mart and smack gum. The pattern of gum thrown wrapper on the floor the way Champ’s grandfather did before he had a mental breakdown.

From this direction, I wonder how old Arlene must have been when she watched her  own father suffer a mental breakdown. Perhaps this led Arlene to deny reality and romanticize everything in her world. Perhaps Arlene blamed herself and never formed stability in her life again. With Arlene compulsively dating new men, she did not have to commit stable emotions with one man. What would happen if she began to love and trust a man? Would this man break Arlene’s heart and leave the same way her own father did? Why does Arlene continue to put her own life and her children’s lives in danger by going on dates with strange new men?

When I conclude reading “Miss Clairol,” I do not really have optimism that Arlene, Gregorio, or Champ are able to become successful in their lives. I think this is one of the hardest stories to read besides Cynthia Ozick’s “The Shawl” and Leslie Marmon Wilkos’ “The Storyteller.” Combined, these three stories and several others continue to remind me that not every young woman has been able to experience a happy life or a happy-ever after ending. In fact, some endings are disappointing to read.

A happy ending for Miss Clairol would have been for Arlene to not step outside the front door. Arlene could have decided to blow this man off and told him she was not interested in dating anymore until after her daughter has left home. Arlene could have used some of the money from working to treat Champ to a nice dinner and a new outfit and get her hair fixed. This would give Champ a more pleasant environment to form a lasting relationship with her mother.  Champ could be able to express her hurt feelings that her mother chose men before her. Champ can also tell Arlene she is afraid of the men who pick her mother up outside.

The end is not happy at all. Arlene gets into a fancy car with a strange man and drives off into the night. Champ is left alienated in the home. Gregorio does not return home probably for hours or the next day. The patterns of co-dependency, irresponsibility, and alienation continue on. This is real for several young children and teenagers in modern times. So the children and teenagers become so lonely being left alone at home that they seek out friends from a nearby gang who will accept them, experiment with drugs, alcohol, and prostitution. Respect for authority figures does not seem important to the youth because this was not taught early on. if the youth begins to behave right, respect is given. This new feeling of respect can either be a motivation to want to do better in the world or this can lead to a lifelong discomfort whose wound are never able to heal.

Amanda-Leigh’s Conclusion

Yesterday morning I chose the pseudonym “Moncrief” as my last name for writing. The name originates from Constance Fenimore Cooper’s short story, “Miss Grief.” I wanted to choose a name that would be unique and open eyes. I don’t believe Miss Grief deserved the respect she sought as an early feminist author. This is for another writing entirely. As much as I would love to write my heart out on Miss Grief’s behalf and through stones of arrogance at the male writer she sought for help, I am unable to do so this morning.

I am trying to recover from a nasty cold. Two days ago my voice became hoarse along with congestion. Even though I was born this state, winter and I have never had a love-love relationship.  When I was a child, I hardly ever became sick. As an adult in modern times, I seem to get a cold every winter.

My son will be getting his yearly vaccination shots at vet appointment this afternoon. His Daddy will be taking him to the appointment. The last time Luigi went to the vet, the vet told his Daddy this was the nicest and well behaved he had ever seen. Luigi’s nails were cut. At the vet, Luigi did not try to bite the nurse.

At home when my husband cut Luigi’s toe nails, he was given to me to hold still. The process frustrated my husband and upset Luigi. Today, I have high hopes our son will behave for the vet. I have also come to learn that a child behaves better for strange new people than parents at home. I strongly believe in the power of miracles.

I would like to express my gratitude for the gift of motherhood. As a mother living in today’s world, things are not as easy as they were during our time of growing up. There are days when I would love to return to the safe haven of childhood and stay there awhile – at least until bedtime!

Amanda-Leigh’s Quote of the Day:


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